Sex work is work. Period.
And it’s valid and valuable, just like any other profession.
Full stop. ????
Sex workers, just like other laborers, deserve to work in a safe environment where their needs are honored and respected.
And historically, they haven’t gotten that. They’re still NOT getting that in many cases.
Let’s a take a deep breath together and unpack this. ????
TW/CW: sex worker stigmatization, toxic masculinity, suggestions of sexual violence, toxic Christianity, white supremac
It is not the fault of sex workers that their industry has been stigmatized for centuries and that we have lived in a culture dominated by toxic masculinity.
Instead of honoring the beautiful, healing power that sex work can have, Western culture has often commercialized it beyond recognition, fetishized sex workers, and treated them as less than human.
And because of Puritan morality, we have deemed sex work as something that must be outlawed. Rather than addressing the root causes of sexual shame and trauma.
What has that created?
- A multi-billion-dollar underground black market for p0rn0graphy and s3x work
- Rampant consent violations on adult film sets and inadequate compensation
- Unhealthy power dynamics and toxic work arrangements for many sex workers
- Stigmatization of their profession (chosen or not) and sometimes secrecy and isolation
White supremacy (often masquerading as Christianity) has also shamed countless LGBTQ+ and trans/non-binary youth.
Which has resulted in…
- LGBTQ+ and trans teens being kicked out of their homes simply for being their authentic selves
- Trans women (especially Black and brown ones) turning to sex work, often as street walkers, which is the RISKIEST kind of sex work
- Trans women of color being murdered at higher rates proportionally; historically, many of those murders (often by cis-het white men) have been excused or justified
- Perpetuating outdated and racist gender norms, creating BILLIONS of dollars worth of societal issues, including housing insecurity for Black and Brown trans women
Like I said, this is white supremacy masquerading as Christianity.
Matthew 25:40 in the New International Version…
“The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.’
What does “least” mean in this context?
Who is most vulnerable in Western culture, especially the United States?
- Trans and gender non-conforming folx
- Folx with disabilities
- Sex workers
What are we doing for the least of these in our culture?
Jesus was a fucking radical and welcomed those that were thought of as “less than” by the powers that be. He welcomed sex workers. Unlike many of us, he treated them as human, as worthy of dignity and respect.
Whether we identify as Christian or not, why the hell are we not doing the same?
NO ONE deserves to be mutilated or massacred because of the work they do. Even if it’s illegal. ????????
NO ONE should have to risk death, endangerment, stabbing, homelessness, or disease to have their basic needs met. ????????
NO ONE should be shamed because of the work that they do, and have to keep their profession secret from friends and family to stay safe. ????????
As a sex educator and holistic sex coach, I’ve had the honor of meeting so many beautiful people who work in the sex industry.
Some have a background as Tantrikas. Some have worked as escorts. Some have been performers. Some have had OnlyFans accounts.
They’ve been caring, conscious, committed humans. Who want to create a more healed world where ANY authentic, consensual expressions of sexuality aren’t shamed.
I’ve also met people who have been clients of sex workers.
People I care about. People I respect. Conscious humans who are committed to doing good in the world.
They are not seedy, desperate, or evil. They were seeking healing, intimacy, and connection.
Sex has the power to HEAL TRAUMA and help people connect with their souls. Being able to support someone in that way is truly a power and a gift. Being able to receive that healing is a gift and an honor.
So, in summary…
Sex work is NOT A JOKE, and it SHOULD NOT be treated as one. ????
Sex work is NOT EVIL, and does NOT deserve to be stigmatized. ????
Sex work is VALID and deserves to be treated as such. ✔️
If this post makes you angry, I invite you to do the following:
- Take a few deep breaths. Maybe several. Meditate. Go for a walk. Bring your nervous system to a state of calm. Get back to green ????. (Unsure on what that means? Learn more here.)
- WATCH Season 1 of POSE on Netflix and read Vanity Fair’s interview with Indya Moore who is a Latinx trans-feminine actrexx who plays Angel in POSE. You will learn a lot from the show, and from them.
- Read about sex workers’ experiences. LEARN what they face and go through. LEARN about the history of sex work and how it became stigmatized.
- REFLECT on your biases around sex work(ers). Where do they come from? Why do you have them? What can you do to shift them?
- READ about sacred sex work and Tantra. If you want resources or recommendations, let me know in the comments.
And when you’re ready to be an activist, help create a world where sex work is…
- STOP supporting free porn sites and INVEST in ethical porn instead. If you notice you have a compulsive pattern with porn that isn’t serving you, seek the support of a sex-positive therapist or coach. If you need a referral, I’m happy to make one.
- DONATE to causes like Selah House or Trans Housing Coalition that help heal the root issues. Selah House helps sex trafficking victims who are in recovery, and Trans Housing Coalition helps trans people get off the streets in Atlanta.
- WRITE to your state Congress about decriminalizing sex work and soliciting.
- FOLLOW sex educators/witches/workers on Instagram, FetLife, or OnlyFans and AMPLIFY their voices, especially if they are BIPOC, queer, TGNC, disabled, or neurodivergent.
- CONTINUE doing your own trauma healing work. The more you heal your own triggers, the more you can hold space for others who have different perspectives.
That’s the work. It’s important.
Take it in small baby steps. Meet yourself where you are. Stretch yourself slightly each day.
Working together, we will make a difference and create a more fully healed world where sex work is universally acknowledged as being valid, valuable, and important work.
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